I skipped work to stalk him.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
