yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
