They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Randomize
