The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize
