If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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