As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
