I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Randomize
