He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
foreskin is a definite game changer
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize
