I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Randomize
