I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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