dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
My penis needs a shock collar
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
