the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Randomize
