my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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