yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
