i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
