just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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