have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
