real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
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