It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Even my vagina gasped.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
