There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
