A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
