Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
