Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Randomize
