Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I intend to get homeless drunk
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
