i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
My ass is underappreciated
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
