omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
there is glitter all over my balls
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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