Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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