in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
