found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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