I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
wow bdsm is so cute
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
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