no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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