Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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