I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize
