She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Randomize
