She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
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