After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Randomize
