Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
She even gives head with a lisp.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
