You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
People in love make me want to vomit
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Randomize
