Ambien. No doubt about it.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
FUCK WHALES
Randomize