it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize
