2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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