there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
