I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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