could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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