You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Randomize
