I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
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