my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
The power of my boobs compel you
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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