how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Shitshow foam night was such a success
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize