i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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