How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Randomize
