super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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